Thoughts on Halloween 2018 and the deletion of all previous sequels

Every single fan of the Halloween franchise had gone crazy when John Carpenter, creator of Michael Myers and director of the 1978 iconic slasher movie, announced the release of the last, ultimate sequel to the story of the masked killer and Laurie Strode.

John Carpenter.jpgThis feeling of pure enthusiasm lasted until Carpenter himself claimed the upcoming movie won’t take into account any of the sequels – let alone Rob Zombie’s remake. Fans started ranting on the director/producer and on his ‘disrespectful decision’.

With this controversy polarising horror audiences, I thought it could be somewhat useful to share my opinion about the subject matter, all the while providing my readers with some news about the upcoming Halloween.

Continue reading “Thoughts on Halloween 2018 and the deletion of all previous sequels”

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Scraping the bottom of the barrel… something decent came out. Jigsaw – spoiler filled movie review

John Kramer, star and saving grace of the Saw franchise had long gone, beaten up and violated by an endless stream of tiresome sequels rather than killed off by cancer as it’s claimed in Saw III.

Jigsaw 1However, he still manages to be brought back to life in Jigsaw. A movie that kicks off with five people held captive in a barn, each with a metal noose around their neck. If you’re familiar with this 14-year-long franchise, you’d expect this to be the by-now famous first trap that’s shown before the movie title appears on screen.

 

Continue reading “Scraping the bottom of the barrel… something decent came out. Jigsaw – spoiler filled movie review”

Fierce and pure body horror in the desolation of urban life. Let Her Out – movie review

We stay in Canada, where my last blog post followed the footsteps of a very unusual vampire, this time to take a look at a much more conventional movie.

In fact, body horror – the sub-genre Let Her Out belongs to – has had its peak during the late 90s/early 00s, with many flicks exploiting the wearing away, rotting and destruction of human flesh caused by some sort of inner issue.

Let Her Out, written and directed by Cody Calahan (Antisocial and Antisocial 2), kicks off, quite in-your-face, with a prostitute tirelessly banging a stream of clients, until some stranger breaks into her motel room and rapes her. As a result, she gets pregnant and decides to kill herself and the baby by stubbing her own womb with scissors.

Let Her Out 223 years down the line, Helen (Alana LeVierge) begins to have awful visions and hallucinations that cause the girl to have black holes in her memory and to forget where she’s been and what she’s done for long periods of time. Lately, it’s discovered that Helen’s mom was the prostitute at the beginning of the movie – she was pregnant with twins and, when she tried to kill them, she succeeded only partially, since one of the foetuses attached to the other in order to survive.

Continue reading “Fierce and pure body horror in the desolation of urban life. Let Her Out – movie review”

Myths and thrills create a creepy night terror experience. Slumber – movie review

Everybody has been creeped out at least once by a friend or family member who sleepwalked or sleep-talked during the night, awakening us with a real-life jump-scare creepier than the entire Paranormal Craptivity franchise (definition by my friend Jimmy).

Slumber – an American/British movie that will have its wide release only in 2018 – plays with this primal fear and mixes it with ancient Eastern European myths.

Slumber 1Alice (Maggie Q), a doctor specialised in sleep disorders who’s been haunted by nightmares related to the sleepwalking death of her younger brother when she was just a child, is investigating on a family who suffered from the loss of their youngest kid. Mom, dad, brother and sister are dealing with recurrent nightmares who cause them dangerous sleepwalking episodes and terrifying sleep paralysis. Whilst this might depend on them coming to terms with grief and depression, the youngest boy, Danny (Lucas Bond), proves particularly vulnerable to physical harm during the episodes in which he sees a creepy figure lingering on him and preventing him from moving or screaming.

Continue reading “Myths and thrills create a creepy night terror experience. Slumber – movie review”

The Blackcoat’s Daughter (2017) EXPLAINED.

I’ve been waiting to write this since the moment I got to the end of Oz Perkins’ The Blackcoat’s Daughter!

Blackcoat's Daughter 1If you haven’t seen the movie and are wondering why I should focus my attention on a motion picture that grossed only $20,435 worldwide, check out my spoiler-free take on the movie, since I’m now about to spoil the hell out of this complex film in the next few paragraphs. Continue reading “The Blackcoat’s Daughter (2017) EXPLAINED.”

Stranger Things 2 expanded its universe and characters, entering adulthood – TV series review

Picking up one year after the events of season 1, Stranger Things 2 brings back all the characters we fell in love with (besides Barbara… #justiceforBarb).

ST 2 featureAs the cliff-hanger at the end of the first season showed us, Will had been affected more than we thought by the Upside-Down and he’s now living a life full of visions from that nasty dimension. Meanwhile, Chief Hopper had rescued, helped and hidden Eleven for almost a year, to keep her safe from the bad guys; Mike and the losers club (ops, wrong pop reference!) are trying to understand what Will’s going through, deal with Eleven’s absence and contend with Madmax, a new girl gotten in town that both Dustin and Lucas have a crush on; meanwhile Steve, Nancy and Jonathan are caught up in their love triangle. Continue reading “Stranger Things 2 expanded its universe and characters, entering adulthood – TV series review”

Office rage breaks loose and it’s loads of fun! Mayhem – movie review

Whoever has had any kind of experience in an office job would know the feeling of being the unhumanised part of a soulless corporation.

Luckily, as an employee of Sky Sports Italia, I don’t get that sensation, but I both experienced it first hand in previous jobs and heard constantly about it from friends and family. Continue reading “Office rage breaks loose and it’s loads of fun! Mayhem – movie review”

Between Let the Right One In and Raw. The Transfiguration – movie review

Transfiguration 1.1.jpgOutcast teenager with shady past and obscure life meets youngster who’s bullied and abused by a bunch of assholes. They team up, go through that stuff and grow up together.

No, guys, I’m not reviewing the ground-breaking Swedish horror drama Let the Right One In (2008). Instead, the one mentioned above is the storyline of The Transfiguration, a 2017 film written and directed by Michael O’Shea at his filmmaking debut. Continue reading “Between Let the Right One In and Raw. The Transfiguration – movie review”

TOP 10 laughably bad scenes in 2017 horror movies (so far)

As some of you might now, I’ve written a top 10 spookiest scenes post to celebrate Friday the 13th appropriately.

While recalling the chilling sequences in horror movies I watched this year, I also remembered some of the worst ones. However, with this post I decided to list up the 10 most hilariously awful moments in horror films that came out in 2017. Therefore, I left aside those plain awful or boring scenes, in order to focus on and get some enjoyment from some involuntarily bad bits. I hope you will enjoy!

10 Dance like crazySplit. I was very keen on the latest Shyamalan’s movie in my review. However, upon watching it again, I noticed some elements that didn’t quite work: as such, when Kevin – the villain with split personality – puts up a dance scene in front of the main girl, I laughed out loud. This scene is hilarious, but I’m not sure whether it tries to be or not…

Leatherface 39 Leatherface trying to speakLeatherface. On top of a terribly executed movie, the otherwise rather decent final climax gets ruined by the clumsy, awkward attempt to speak by the titular character whose mouth has been previously sewn shut. As the audience, we are supposed to feel for and be creeped out by him, but the scene is so poorly made that Leatherface looks more like a teenager on MDMA (or like Sylvester Stallone…) rather than the unsettling antihero he is.

8 Chucky minions Cult of Chucky. The 7th instalment of this campy franchise was surprisingly enjoyable, in my opinion. However, when three little possessed dolls with different haircuts surround the weird psychiatrist, I couldn’t help but laugh all the air out of my lungs: they reminded me so much of the minions from the animated Despicable Me franchise.

7 Oh shit, the train! The Bye Bye Man. This January movie is hilariously bad and contains so many WTF?! moments. Also, it has an inexplicable fetish for trains. Thus, when one of the main characters has a vision caused by the titular Bye Bye Man, she runs on a railway and gets run over by a train. A huge, fat, loud train that she didn’t see coming until it was too late: the girl’s face right before she dies is priceless and it seriously made my day!

Raw GIF6 I’m a tasty girlRaw. This one might be hard to sell, because people seem to love this artsy coming-of-age French horror. I hated it, even though I’ll never deny it’s a rather well-made film from a technical standpoint. Anyway, when Justine discovers her cannibal tendencies, she starts to bite herself up while having sex with her roommate. People might find that disturbing, but the way that scene was handled made me chuckle quite a bit.

5 Catfight – Wish UponI hated this factory product, guys. This movie is just plain silly and boring. Fortunately, though, when the lead girl pulls up a slap-fight with a cheerleader in the school cafeteria, the audience can burst out in laughter. Surely, this isn’t what the director tries to achive. But hey, it makes for a ridiculously bad and memorable sequence!

Bye Bye Man 24 Wink wink little starThe Bye Bye Man. This movie makes me laugh so hard that I think it will become one of my guilty pleasures. In the “pinnacle of tension” (the bunny ears are very much needed), one of the guys haunted by the Bye Bye Man winks to a police officer played by Trinity from The Matrix (I’ve no idea what Carrie-Ann Moss is doing in this flick, by the way) that winks back at him. Their surprised reactions cracked me up: it’s the Bye Bye Man who made them wink! Such an evil entity… what is he going to do next? Make them clap hands? I don’t know if I’d have the guts to stand it…

3 CGI spiders are a recipe for disaster The Evil Within. After a 15-year-long making process, The Evil Within came out as one of the most pleasant surprises of 2017. However, a CGI spider crafted with technology that dates back in 2003 pops up on screen in two sequences and it just looks… awful. Laughably awful, that is. Hey, if you’ve seen IT – the 1990 miniseries – you know that this idea never works!

2 Killings by the lake Lake Alice. Oh man, I love this movie! This indie, straight to DVD piece of garbage features some of the worst acting, story and killings I have ever seen. But they are hilarious! Mostly, the bloodless killings that turn this flick into the worst slasher ever made and, in my opinion, an amazing “so bad, it’s great” movie. Seriously, Lake Alice needs to be seen to be believed!

1 “I’ll do the fingering” Alien: Covenant. Perhaps, you saw this one coming. Covenant is not, per se, a terrible movie, but it’s definitely the most disappointing one I have seen in 2017, as a big fan of the Alien franchise. This scene, and the entire sequence, takes itself so seriously but it’s just plain laughable. The “I’ll do the fingering” quote probably marks the most hilarious moment I experienced in a theatre the entire year!